Eric André Takes the Cheeseball Challenge

Got to catch one.

It's all about your throw. I'm right here. Has nothing to do with. Oh my goodness. Oh! Oh, that was close. You could have moved just a little bit.

One more, one more. Then you want to. Here, how about I just? I'll just feed it. Yes. We'll do this. Oh, wow. He has a show with his name on it, which means he's important. Eric Andre hanging out on the couch. Yes! No claps? That's it. Yes. Yes. Pause. Yes. Thank you. Yes. Well, thank you, thank you for coming in and not destroying our stuff.

Where's Oliver? I'm Oliver. I'm trying to picture a duck's penis right now.

When are you not? It's nice. Quit that big accent and talk to me. I got partners.

Oliver has. spread his chicken around the office, mate.

Oh. Wow. You want to. You want to tell me that before we started?

I did. I did. I just to explain his absence. I know that you prefer him. He is much. That's the old season. He's much prettier. Won't you get the image from the new season? That's in the past. I will make a request. You have to accept the impermanence of all things and you have to live in the present moment. Everything is ephemeral. We should meditate. Like right now. Squirt up. Right now. What's up? What's that?

Well, What's going on with you? What is going on with you? You're being crazy.

Oh, I'm being crazy. Yeah. Is this weird for you because usually you have the guest on your show and you? I am so bloated right now. I might go to the bathroom and give myself a C-section.

Wow. Yeah. Wow. Well, we're going to do the cheese ball challenge later. So, So get ready. Get ready. Uh, your show is a deconstructed talk show. Is that a fair assessment?

Go on Wikipedia, the goddamn show.

I will, I'm just going by. Don't you do that to me? No, Wikipedia. You're a very busy dude. You are, you have your own show. You have, hey, hey. Uh, you are on Man Seeking Woman. You play quite the ladies' man. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Has that helped you in real life?

Not at all. Oh, well. I am a virgin. I am impotent.

There is someone out there for you.

I don't think so.

I'm, no, there is at least a dating site for you.

Disagree.

I think. No, we'll find you one. We'll find you one. We'll find you one.

Don't touch me. Nothing gives you that right.

Oh, sorry. My body is a temple. It is. You dress it as such. Enjoy, enjoy. Did you pick your shirt out today? Did you pick your shirt?

I did. Yeah. I wanted to match. Your set.

You're matching very well. I like it. So what's going on in this bar? You know what? I'm just going to tear this up because this is not This is just not happening. You are, but you are seriously busy. You are going on tour. Yes. Yes. What Okay, doing stand-up is like one of my top three fears. Scary. What's It is terrifying. It's not easy. No. So, why would anyone want to do it?

I didn't get enough hugs when I was a kid and I needed validations from strangers.

Okay, well, you don't want me to touch you so we can we can air hug. Okay. Oh, we can real hug. Okay. Oh, so it's okay I touch you now? Is it okay?

You want to. Yeah, because it's consensual.

Okay, got it. Got it. As opposed to before. Um, so when your guests have any idea what?

Nothing. They know zero. They know zero when they come on there. They don't know what's going on.

Do you ever feel bad for putting them through the kind of torture that you put them through?

No, they deserve it.

Why? What did they ever do to you?

Um, they tortured me.

They tortured you? What did they do to you? No, they didn't.

No. I sometimes I do feel bad, but it's all, it's all love. Okay. And I'm just doing it to joke around. And it's never the end result is never to be mean. Okay. It's just to be confusing and silly.

Do you have any dream guests for your show?

Jerry Sandusky.

Who, who is Who is the worst guest on your show?

I love all my guests. They're all my children. We only have two guests walk out. We had uh, Laura Conrad walk out last year and T. I. T. I. walked out this year.

Oh no. Which one was more offensive to you? Who was more offensive to you?

I think I was more offensive to them. Yeah. They weren't really that offensive to me.

You were offensive. They walked out. You were offensive. They walked out.

I was fine. But but T. I. , T. I. wasn't as pissed off. He just had enough. Got it. He reached his peak. Yeah.

Um, Hannibal uh, did this to one of your guests, Nick Cannon, who actually was sitting right where you're sitting not too long ago. I smell those pheromones. So, yeah, I know, right? So, I thought we would I thought we would like replicate that and do something called the cheese ball challenge. Um, and just, you know, see how many we could get into Eric Andre. Are you down? Are you ready for this?

Sure. Oh. Oh. Not even, not even trying, dude. Oh. It's a white couch. Come on, you got to catch one. You got to catch one. You got to catch one. It's all about your throw. I'm right here. Has nothing to do with. Oh my goodness. Oh. Oh, that was close. You could have moved just a little bit. One more, one more. Then you want to. Here, how about I just? I'll just feed it. Yes. We'll do this. Oh, wow.

I'm allergic to cheeses, so I can't have any.

Oh, okay. Well, there's an epi pen somewhere, so you know. You want another one? Was that the whole interview? Did we start?